Wednesday, 23 October 2013

DullGate could not MOUNT eyeBM

MyCrowShop's CEO DullGate declared in a conference
that only regret in his life is he could not mount eyeBM.

He tried hard though .
But his effort could not get HARD enough to facilitate a mount.

He built a house of numerous windows without
any screen or curtain.

So, whenever he felt it , it was all open all the sides.
He could not open his or eyeBM's due to openness all around.

And so much of messy chaos the crows his company sold created. They were crashing every now and then through the open windows, when he was in mood. All sorts of Bugs , Worms sneaked in for a bite of uncontrolled testosterone smell wafting out of windows. 

He was not able to shut down his windows to stop the crows crashing. Finally, eyeBM invented a stick to CONTROL and DELETE these crows from his bedroom.

But, it was difficult to handle his own stick and eyeBM's stick at the same time.

He said , it is a lesson in stick management that finally eased the problem to some extent , but it took many years when his own stick weltered away.

It is the sad memory of his unused stick that lingers even today.

Disclaimer : The characters and names above are purely fictional.
Author doesn't intend to hurt anyone's sensibility and integrity.
Only objective is some hearty lungful of laugh without any prejudice in regards of race, sex, profession and religion.

10 LIVE lobsters

Physical Punishment to Students
in any form is UNACCEPTABLE.
 
Justification put forward  by a Headmaster went like this :
 
Nowadays kids are being born with Twitter
& Face book a/c ready in hand. So they're
considered an adult from the 1st Wahh-Wahh.
So, Punishment for the boy is Justified

What do you do with these Monsters ?

The Jury gave verdict :
Stuff this animal's mouth with 10 live Lobsters &
let the boy & his classmates kick his ass 999 times.
Of course , Bandaids & Tetanus will be provided at the end.


Disclaimer : The characters and names above are purely fictional.
Author doesn't intend to hurt anyone's sensibility and integrity.
Only objective is some hearty lungful of laugh without any prejudice in regards of race, sex, profession and religion.


 

Expiry Date of Microsoft

The news has it that the Microsoft patent for opening a new
window on click of a link is going to expire soon.

My friend was so ecstatic hearing the news the
Microsoft itself is going to EXPIRE soon.

He said, let new windows be opened
with new breeze pouring in for a CHANGE.


Disclaimer : The characters and names above are purely fictional.
Author doesn't intend to hurt anyone's sensibility and integrity.
Only objective is some hearty lungful of laugh without any prejudice in regards of race, sex, profession and religion.

Black Berry Blue Berry & Hollow Berry

It heard that actress Hello Berry was named after a fruit.
I am still to figure out which fruit.

Went to fruit shops and asked :

"Hello , Black Berry , are you Hollow?"
 "No. I am juicy. Go to Hollywood for Hollowness"

"Hello , Blue Berry , are you Hollow?"
 "No. I am juicy .Go to Hollywood for Hollowness"

"Hello , Rasp Berry , are you Hollow?"
"No. I am juicy. Go to Hollywood for Hollowness"

Holly ghost ! The all know the address !


Disclaimer : The characters and names above are purely fictional.
Author doesn't intend to hurt anyone's sensibility and integrity.
Only objective is some hearty lungful of laugh without any prejudice in regards of race, sex, profession and religion.


 

Tuesday, 22 October 2013

DirtyPigus Sewerfucking Animalana

      
  informed that many Countries
 Don't accept Blood Donation from Gays.
 
Funny Joke Master ‏@jokefactory24x7  replied :
 
It has Nothing to with GAY.
They are PERFECTLY normal.
They have selected their destiny.
 
It is the Prez, PM, CANCELlors of these countries
Who enacted such laws.
 
Because, otherwise their Blood Analysis
will reveal their BLOODY CORRUPTED genes
 
ingdicating their origin from a species called
DirtyPigus  Sewerfucking Animalana.


Disclaimer : The characters and names above are purely fictional.
Author doesn't intend to hurt anyone's sensibility and integrity.
Only objective is some hearty lungful of laugh without any prejudice in regards of race, sex, profession and religion.
 
 
 

PEACE be your GLORY

Open Your HEART
Realize the BRILLIANCE in others
Share your RAINBOW of LOVE

Bring JOY to the NEEDY
Let PEACE be your GLORY
JOY be your CROWN


 

Tennis with Pennis

Funny Joke Master ‏@jokefactory24x7 
      
Some Guys play Tennis
With their Balls & PENNIS,
                                Pen, they don't carry,
Use PENNIS instead,
Always they are 
                                In a big HURRY!
 


Disclaimer : The characters and names above are purely fictional.
Author doesn't intend to hurt anyone's sensibility and integrity.
Only objective is some hearty lungful of laugh without any prejudice in regards of race, sex, profession and religion.

Blob of HEART & Intellect

Funny Joke Master ‏@jokefactory24x7    
                  
CROSS the BOUNDARY, son
Be not AFRAID of UNKNOWN
Know well , YOU are STRONG.
A Unique blob of HEART & INTELLECT
Door Beyond Universe BECKONs
 
 
 

LabYu Means : Oxford Dictionary

What LabYU means?

In my Language I speak which I just invented :

LabYU : Love YoU : if you are on my side

LabYU : CUT YoU in Lab Like a FROG : if you are on In-Laws side and cross every word I speak.

I had applied for my new invention.
The OxBored Dictionary Committee congratulated me for this superb definition.

I am informed they will include this term in their next edition.
Don't forget to buy this edition for your grandkid.



Disclaimer : The characters and names above are purely fictional.
Author doesn't intend to hurt anyone's sensibility and integrity.
Only objective is some hearty lungful of laugh without any prejudice in regards of race, sex, profession and religion.

Monday, 21 October 2013

Don't be FRuckStrated

CHANGE,

for The BUTTER or WORSE
Is the SPICE of LIFE.

Hey, Do Not WORRY the PRICE,
SPICE GALs will come for  RESCUE,

Don't FRUCKstrate and shout
I'll F:)K U.

Wonder 2-in-1 Blonde

SlyFox3 News Channel :

It is the 8th Wonder of the World.
People are flocking to see this wonder Blonde.
You can book your ticket on
 www.SlyFox3.com\WonderBlonde\Booking\

Our Exclusive correspondent reports that this girl has a dick in the valley of her breasts. She is bloody voluptu-georgeous.

But more on this to come , now a small commercial.
Stay glued to your seat or in your pot or wherever you are.

We have exclusive photo shots of this 8th wonder dick
after this break. Don't go away. Dick will follow shortly"


Disclaimer : The characters and names above are purely fictional.
Author doesn't intend to hurt anyone's sensibility and integrity.
Only objective is some hearty lungful of laugh without any prejudice in regards of race, sex, profession and religion.

  

Prez mails to Santa for bandaid

Santa has got a mail from the Prez,

"Dear Santa,

  Hope You are Doing well.
  Don't bring just a few kitkats this time, please.
  I like them, but may be , later.

  This xMas Send truckload of Band Aids, Tapes,
  anti-Rabies Vaccines .

  Preparing for PIG Bites in Feb 14.

  Lastly, can I borrow $100Tn from your Swiss Account
  My Govt needs  to repair my torn underwears , and send
  aid to my friendly countries to buy more weapons from us.

  Money or no money, don't forget the vaccines please."


Disclaimer : The characters and names above are purely fictional.
Author doesn't intend to hurt anyone's sensibility and integrity.
Only objective is some hearty lungful of laugh without any prejudice in regards of race, sex, profession and religion.

 

LOVE is the Strongest BOND

LOVE is the Strongest BOND
Intrinsic to a human soul.
LOVE without boundary shall WIN
ARROGANT powers
Shall eventually lose to People's LOVE.
The Dawn will rise.

go SCREWdriving , be not SAD

Broke up with your BF ?

DO this :

Say , "GOOD riddance!"
Kick on his ass and go SCREWdriving.
Don't be SAD.
Bite with jest and VIGOUR, Beauty.
Don't skip even a single Meal.
Sleep well.

Statutory warning : Don't carry any gun , or screwdriver or any weapon please.

Disclaimer : The characters and names above are purely fictional.
Author doesn't intend to hurt anyone's sensibility and integrity.
Only objective is some hearty lungful of laugh without any prejudice in regards of race, sex, profession and religion.

 

REFORM the Underwear

 Prez says , his NEXT IMMEDIATE job is REFORM.
 When asked, WHAT reform?
"My Underwear" , Prez replied.

 Naturally.
 Badly TORN in Gov Shutdown.
 Underwear Reform Has to be the First PRIORITY now.


Disclaimer : The characters and names above are purely fictional.
Author doesn't intend to hurt anyone's sensibility and integrity.
Only objective is some hearty lungful of laugh without any prejudice in regards of race, sex, profession and religion.